1438H

Entah apa yang memperindah, tapi perpaduan langit beserta awannya, pohon beserta daunnya, gajah beserta lambang Kraton Yogya-nya, dan gunungan beserta abdi dalem-nya, selalu berhasil membuat aku yang ngga memiliki keahlian memotret ini bisa mengabadikan gambar yang (menurutku) indah di Pakualaman.

Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitri 1438 H. Mohon maaf lahir dan batin.

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Putri Ariesanti

Segala puji bagi Allaah pemilik semesta alam dan isinya, juga hati manusia. Shalawat dan salam kita haturkan kepada Nabi kita, Nabi Muhammad saw, yang telah menuntun kita ke Dinul Islam.

2017 adalah tahunnya 2011, mungkin. Banyak pasangan belia memutuskan untuk mengikat janji suci dan mengesahkan ikatan yang sudah terjalin. Termasuk juga Putri Ariesanti, my highschool best friend. Sudah lama Putri dan (sekarang) tunangannya menjalin hubungan, tapi lihat wujud aslinya baru saat mereka bertunangan (biasanya cuma dicurhatin atau lihat dari instagram).

I am so happy for you, Put! Selamat yaaa, semoga Huwaida Nabilah segera menyusul dan diberi pencerahan untuk menjalani karir dan asmara secara simultan, Allaahuma aamiin.

&OH! Selamat untuk dr. Huwaida Nabilah! Dulu aku berguru di kos-kosannya untuk bisa lulus UN SMA sampai pulang pagi terus. Setiap detik selalu tanya, setiap bingung sedikit selalu konsul. Dan ngga percaya aja sekarang kita sejawat. Thank you and I’m so proud of you, dear!

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Btw, tenang. Jangan panik kalau ditanyain, “kapan nyusul?” karena hidup itu ngga ada yang tau lika-likunya. Dinikmatin aja, nanti kan ketemu sendiri, nanti kan menikah juga (asal tetap diusahakan). Bismillaah-in aja. :)

 

Same Feelings, Different Situation.

“The past can never be erased. It is always going to be there. I don’t know who that person was, the person that said those horrible things, that person just depressed, angry at the world, felt like they would never accepted, was seeking attention, I was someone that love to seek attention, I love the shock value, fighting anger with anger. And does that making okay? Absolutely not.

What I was saying is not what I represent. I think it’s awful that you guys see me in that light. I’m so sorry for everything that I said in the past, I can never turn back time and take that moments away. 

Looking back to that person, I felt like a piece of shit and what did I do? I fought back with anger, with rage. And it’s wrong. Just because someone insults you, it is not okay to fight back. But sometimes that’s how we handle things, we’re human beings. And at the end of the day, people forget that pass the money, the cars, the clothes, I’m just one tiny little person on this earth trying to make a better life for me and my family.

I’m nowhere near perfect. I’m literally the furthest thing from perfect. I made mistakes everyday. But I’ve learnt from them. The intent behind my words back then I said really horrible things back to people to hurt them, to harm them, to shock them, to let them know that, “you’re gonna call me something? I’m gonna cut you back so hard and make you feel like a piece of shit because you make me feel low.” And that’s not okay to fight words with words like that.

Even recently when people saying some fucked up to me or trying to get reaction, I do give in. I am weak, I am selfish, I have anger problem sometimes, I lashed out when people lashed out at me. Because it’s hard not to react sometimes.

I’m so sorry that any of you ever had to see me like that. It makes me want to erase myself sometimes. I looked at that and I was like I can’t believe I used to be that miserable and unhappy. I want to let you guys know that I’m sorry for ever saying those things, that doesn’t represent anything about how I feel, that is not who I am. And I apologise deep down to the core of my fucking being.”

— Jeffree Star, 2017

*baru menikmati menu buka puasa di Bakso Tengkleng Mas Bambang*
Mas: aduh mas bingung deh dek
Me: bingung kenapa?
Mas: habisnya mas tu pengen pulang Solo, tapi Mas ngga mau ninggalin adek di Yogya
Me: haaah?
Mas: beneran, mas ngga pengen ninggalin adek di Yogya. Mas seneng banget bisa berduaan sama adek seharian gini
Me: *girang di dalam, garang di luar* bohong
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*mau sholat maghrib*
Mas: dek, mas tambah sayang sama adek..
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Mas: mas excited banget nih dek
Me: excited kenapa?
Mas: bisa menghabiskan waktu seharian sama adek..
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*baru nostalgia tentang masa-masa unyu PDKT*
Mas: .. eh waktu itu kita udah telfonan ya?
Me: iya, dulu yang telfon pertama kali siapa si?
Mas: ya mas lah, ngga mungkin kalau adek duluan.. sepeserpun, sedetik pun ngga ada titin duluan nelfon mas.
Me: kalau chat?
Mas: jelas mas juga.. ngga mungkin kalau adek duluan. wis to, itu tu udah kaya hitam dan putih.. udah jelas.
Me: *kept silent because I felt like a horrible gf*
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Harap Maklum

Kalau kalian mendapati akun LINE ku berganti-ganti, atau aku leave grup tanpa sebab jelas, atau aku menelefon kalian all of the sudden, atau aku meng-unfollow instagram kalian, atau tiba-tiba akun instagramku tidak bisa ditemukan, atau chat kalian ku balas dengan singkat, atau tidak bisa diterjemahkan dengan kamus apapun, or I left it read itu karena handphone ku sedang rusak. Touchscreen-nya error dan sering berlarian untuk menekan yang tidak diperlukan.

Gambar di atas adalah secuil dari sekian ribu typo dan keparahan lain yang terjadi di handphone ku. Kalau chatnya udah panjang-panjang atau bisa dimengerti maksudnya, berarti aku online via komputer/laptop.

Mohon maaf dan harap maklum yaaaaaaa. Smartphone nowadays. Duh.