Jaga tapi Tidak Terjaga

Harusnya sih sekarang saya ada di Bangsal Anggrek buat nge-follow up pasien. Tapi apa daya, energi terkuras habis setelah semalaman jaga VK (Verlos Kamer/Kamar Bersalin) sendirian dan banjir ketuban alias banyak ibu melahirkan.

Mulai dari saya operan jaga, jam 3 sore, udah ada partus (persalinan). Disambung lagi sampai maghrib, dan lanjut lagi jam 10 malam, dan terus ngga berhenti sampai jam 3 pagi. Sekali partus bisa memakan waktu 3 jam (mulai dari kala 2 sampai kala 5 alias mencuci baskom dan alat-alat partus). Baru aja residen saya mengingatkan, “dek jangan lupa ya nanti jam 4 pagi cek denyut jantung janin (DJJ) pasien bed 3 sama 4, sekalian tanda-tanda vitalnya (TTV).” Eh dapat telpon dari Bangsal Anggrek kalau ada ibu melahirkan. Ngga jadi tidur deh barang sejam.

Selepas bantu dokternya jahit jalan lahir ibu tadi, saya kembali melakukan tugas kala 5 (cuci-cuci). Barusan selesai, eh ibu di bed 3 udah menunjukkan tanda-tanda persalinan. Yaudah, batal juga buat tidur (waktu itu udah jam 6 pagi). Karena ada luka robekan yang lumayan berat di ibu tadi, saya selesai kala 5 sekitar jam 8, dan dilanjut ikut konferensi klinis sampai jam 10, dan disambung dengan tutorial dengan konsulen sampai jam 12 (alias detik ini).

Bener-bener deh jaga kali ini super melelahkan jiwa dan raga. Belum pernah dapat partus beruntun seperti semalam. Bahkan waktu nge-asistenin residen buat ngejahit jalan lahir aja saya hampir tidur sambil berdiri (serius). Mana sebelum jam 3 sore (awal jaga) itu saya belum sarapan dan makan siang karena ngga sempat, saya nemenin Nuri jaga VK pagi (jam 7-3sore). Jadi, kemarin cuma makan sekali, itu aja dibelikan Kak Sindhu dan Nuri buat makan malam. :)

Pagi ini juga ngga bisa sarapan karena kegiatan yang sudah saya jabarkan di atas. Dan waktu sampai asrama, langsung mandi, ambil 1 bungkus roti, buka laptop, blogging. -______________-

Pingin tidur banget, tapi ngga tau kenapa godaan blogging sungguh tak tertahankan, meskipun cuma ngepost hal ngga penting begini. Huf. Maafkan sudah membuang waktu berharga Anda……..

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I’m gonna Love You Like I’m gonna Lose You

– Meghan Trainor –

I found myself dreaming, in silver and gold.
Like a scene from a movie, that every broken heart knows.
We were walking on moonlight and you pulled me close,
split second and you disappeared and then I was all alone.

I woke up in tears, with you by my side.
A breath of relief and I realized..
No, we’re not promised tomorrow.

So I’m gonna love you like I’m gonna lose you.
I’m gonna hold you like I’m saying goodbye,
wherever we’re standing.
I won’t take you for granted ’cause we’ll never know
when, when we’ll run out of time.
So I’m gonna love you like I’m gonna lose you.
I’m gonna love you like I’m gonna lose you.

In the blink of an eye, just a whisper of smoke.
You could lose everything. The truth is you never know.

So I’ll kiss you longer, baby.
Any chance that I get I’ll make the most of the minutes and love with no regrets.

Let’s take our time to say what we want.
Use what we got before it’s all gone.
‘Cause no, we’re not promised tomorrow.

Stase 4: You were Inside Your Mom’s Belly

In Obsgyn stage, I learn so many things. Including how amazing human beings are, how great our mothers are.

IMG_9699

I still can not believe that this little creature came out of someone’s belly, can only cry and still don’t know anything, and have no idea what’s going on and what’s going to happen, fresh and cute and kiss-able and have those chubby cheeks and all.

That picture was taken after I helped a mother delivering her baby. It was a lot of screaming, struggle, blood, sweat, tears, and pain. Your mother was (and is and will always be) a hero.

You have to see how big her efforts are to deliver you to this world. I know it’s not a great world, but hey. It was a complete struggle. Her life’s at stake to deliver a hope, a future, a happiness. She screamed a lot, she cried a lot, she begged everyone to stop her pain of delivering you. Maybe this post is just a writing without meaning for you, but I wrote it with all of my heart. You will never understand the pain after you experience it by yourself, or at least witness it with your own eyes.

Love your mother (and wife/future wife), speak to her softly and treat her gently, take a good care of her, and thank her for taking all of the pain to deliver you, for choosing not to give up on you, for forgetting the pain after she knows that you’re happy. Apologize to her for making her in so much pain pre-durante-post delivering you to this world.

And now I understand. Well, not completely, not until I experience delivering a baby by myself but at least I witness their struggle. I understand why Jannah lies beneath our mother’s feet.

Magnetic

I am in Obsgyn stage right now, and this is the second week, and I have to stay at Klaten for 7 weeks. Everytime I get a chance, I’ll drive back home. These are 10 reasons why I wasted my time and energy and gasoline to be back to Yogyakarta:

  1. To see my parents.
  2. To see my best friends.
  3. To drop and pick up my laundry.
  4. To chill and blog things and to sleep in my own bedroom.
  5. I have things to do there.
  6. It’s Yogyakarta.
  7. You.
  8. I’m bored.
  9. I have no idea why.
  10. I still have no idea why.

Yogyakarta is just so magnetic for me. Either Klaten has the same poles with me or Yogyakarta has the different poles with me. Either it’s Yogyakarta itself or the people in it. I don’t know. But it’s so magnetic. Don’t you feel the same? :)

Dear Future Husband

– Meghan Trainor –

Dear future husband,

Here’s a few things you’ll need to know
if you wanna be my one and only all my life.

Take me on a date. I deserve it, babe.
And don’t forget the flowers every anniversary.
Because if you’ll treat me right, I’ll be the perfect wife.
Buying groceries, buy-buying what you need.

You got that 9 to 5.
But, baby, so do I.
So don’t be thinking I’ll be home and baking apple pies.
I never learned to cook, but I can write a hook,
Sing along with me, sing-sing along with me

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady, even when I’m acting crazy, tell me everything’s alright.

Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things you’ll need to know
if you wanna be my one and only all my life.
Dear future husband,
If you wanna get that special loving, tell me I’m beautiful each and every night.

After every fight, just apologize. And maybe then I’ll let you try and rock my body right.
Even if I was wrong (ha!), you know I’m never wrong.
Why disagree? Why, why disagree?

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady, even when I’m acting crazy, tell me everything’s alright.

Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things you’ll need to know
if you wanna be my one and only all my life.

Dear future husband,
Make time for me, don’t leave me lonely, and know we’ll never see your family more than mine.

I’ll be sleeping on the left side of the bed.
Open doors for me and you might get some kisses.
Don’t have a dirty mind, just be a classy guy.
Buy me a ring, buy-buy me a ring.

You gotta know how to treat me like a lady, even when I’m acting crazy, tell me everything’s alright.

Dear future husband,
Here’s a few things you’ll need to know
if you wanna be my one and only all my life.

Dear future husband,
If you wanna get that special loving, tell me I’m beautiful each and every night.

Future husband, better love me right. 💕